You're my little dorito
I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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