Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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