i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
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