Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
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