what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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