well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
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