omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
