If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Randomize
