You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
