My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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