google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
