He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
