Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
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