better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Randomize
