Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
