I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize
