he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
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