I wannas sexs uuuuu
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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