why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
