For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
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