Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
