That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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