I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize