fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
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