What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Randomize
