is wine microwaveable?
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Randomize