I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
