it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
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