My friends, they love my intelligence
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
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