Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
Randomize