life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
