i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
she looked like the before picture.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
