I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
And then my night got REAL pukey
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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