Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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