does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
