worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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