I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Randomize
