are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
