i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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