I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
