You work out of a Hotel?
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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