Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
