no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
