Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
