chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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