you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
