im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
one two three fourrrrnication!
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Randomize
