You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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