Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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