I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Randomize
