looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
